Category Archives: Introspection

Who, being loved, is poor? – Oscar Wilde

Hypothetical – when meeting the extended family and friends of one’s beloved for the first time – who is being tested?

Is it you – the new girlfriend or boyfriend – are you being judged worthy or not of the brother/sister/mother/father/son/daughter/friend – or is it them?

On the one hand you might suppose the extended family and friends have some influence over how your beloved feels or what they might do… but in reality I would like to humbly suggest that their influence pales to nothing compared to love.
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In fact I think it is “them” who be judged. Can you bear to have “them” as your in-laws and friends? Have your feelings changed because of “them” – those who your beloved likes to call his/her mates? What does your beloved’s relationship with his/her family/friends say about your beloved?

Lets be honest – “they” would be lucky to know you. And if your beloved’s happy – who are they to judge!

Nurse Knightingale

Moore RiverI’ve been going through the old photo albums, putting a few online and just enjoying the walk down memory lane. 

This is Poshi Junior aged 4 years and 3 days old.  We went to Moore River with some great friends of ours and HP picked up a little crab which snapped him with its claws.  We all thought he was a big wuus but it turned out to be a baby mudcrab and they really do have tough claws… enough to mangle tongs when adult.  I remember it hurt him quite a lot.

It was also the first time he told us about some weird skin sensitivity he had.  He was Greek and had quite dark olive skin so it seemed odd that he would have a problem. He had to cover up all day.  Lots more photos in the flickr album.
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.Moore River Moore River Moore River

Meantime just call me Cellobella Knightingale – my Groover had to have stitches the other day.  And for days they wept and oozed and generally looked red and angry but he would only use water to clean it.  Eventually I insisted he used neat tea-tree oil.  Within a few hours the wound had stopped weeping. He had the stitches out the next day.  *smug*

Am I Gwendolyn?

I was checking out Em’s Blog where she has admitted writing a secret blog…

That got me to thinking… I used to have a secret blog – I was Princess Sultana and I used to write about what I really felt about things/people/my relationships etc. But I let it lapse and the reason I think I let it lapse is that I write for people to read. I need the reader-writer relationship to be in place for this to be worthwhile. Even if it is only one reader.

I accept that that means that I’m probably shallow and that sometimes I can’t say what I really want to say (not that I seem to censor very much!!) but that’s me.
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I wonder that I didn’t think of writing a journal and leaving it lying around the house for someone to read… maybe I needed a comments facility… maybe I need more than one reader? Maybe my one reader needs to be someone other than those who I live with. An outsider validating my life by reading my blog. That’s a bit scary. 🙂

Maybe I am Gwendolyn from Oscar Wilde’s The Importance of Being Earnest: “I never travel without my diary. One should always have something sensational to read in the train.”

New Year Resolutions

OMG! I completely forgot about New Year Resolutions!

I just found my old blog which lists what I thought I was going to do last year… so how did I do?

1. Keep a food diary – the only reliable way to control intake.

Hmmm no didn’t do that.

2. Continue exercise program – I’ve been pretty good up to now and don’t want the good work to stop.

Stopped in mid-November…

3. Make sure the pool filter basket is emptied daily.

Nuh…

4. Keep on top of the reticulation.

Kind of…

5. Garden at least once a month.

LOL…

6. Stop putting boring jobs (like proof-reading and organising baby-sitters) til the last minute.

Hmmm nuh…

7. Try not to take things too personally.
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ROFL…

8. Remember to take folic acid to control weepy pms symptoms before I start taking things too personally.

THAT’S NOT FUNNY!

9. Do my tax on time (that means doing last year’s too).

Just done it!

10. Get on top of my savings and credit card accounts!

Next question…

They were obviously all rubbish resolutions so this year – even though it’s March – I’m going to…

1. Return emails efficiently
2. Play bridge once a week
3. Love my children
4. Love my husband
5. Love my job
6. Be better at keeping in contact with friends
7. Blog regularly
8. Say yes
9. Save
10. Explore new opportunities

Fingers crossed!

If a tree falls in a forest…

Last weekend I was asked to chair two sessions at the Words and Ideas Festival – part of PIAF. I’m usually pretty nervous about these things but as you know I love reading so the chance to score a pile of books and be *forced* to read for *work* seemed my kind of heaven.

Originally I was booked to do a session on Biographies – I was a bit disappointed when it was cancelled but in a way relieved because frankly, biography ain’t my thang. It was serendipity (my daughter’s current favourite word). Instead I ended up with crime fiction – how to maintain the suspense and young adult fiction. How lucky am I? I love crime fiction and I have two small people who are just getting into YA fiction. Bliss.

We had a bit of email correspondence between the panellists pre-conference which was helpful in working out how to run the sessions. My philosophy about the Words and Ideas conference is that there needs to be interaction between the authors on stage and the audience because the “art” of writing is the harmonic that is created when the work is read.

It’s the same with the visual arts – which is usually presented without explanation for the viewer to interpret. The reader takes the words – and interprets them from their own frame of reference, set of assumptions and life experience.

The joy for me in talking with authors is to discover whether my interpretation matches theirs to some degree.

Sometimes you notice how beautifully the words are written on the page – ‘good writing’ – but for me the best writing is when I don’t notice the construction of a sentence. Although having said that I do love it when a writer employs a particularly fine phrase.

For example, I’m reading Zoe Heller’s book Notes on a Scandal at the moment and she described the teachers in the staff room as slumping “slack shouldered” – what a great descriptive phrase.
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The books I got to read for the Crime Writer’s forum were ‘The Resurrectionist’ by James Bradley – a grisly tale of a young anatomist at the turn of the last century, Michael White’s ‘Equinox’ – which links Newton with a modern murder – very gross scenes – and Louise Welsh’s book ‘The Bullet Trick’ – the tale of a flawed conjurer.

Of the three I enjoyed – and perhaps that’s not the right word – The Resurrectionist best. The writing was superior IMHO and even though the subject matter was challenging :). The thing with good writing is that you feel good that you’ve read it – does that make sense? You might have enjoyed Dan Brown’s Da Vinci Code, but you don’t get that literary high of reading really good writing from it… or at least that’s how I felt.

Equinox was the easist to read – but not challenging – and I found the premise a bit far fetched. The Bullet Trick was the least engaging for me, but not hard to read, just hard to keep reading.

In the Young Adult section I had Garry Disher, Kate McCaffrey and Julia Lawrinson. Of these I found Kate’s and Garry’s books the most engaging – Garry is the more literary of the two I suppose but Kate’s issue of Cyberbullying was on the money. Julia’s book Bye Beautiful I didn’t get into as much but I do like some of her other books and in fact bought one of her younger novels for my girl. We had a lively discussion and the audience were great.

Of both sessions the most interesting point for me was when we started discussing whether or not people write to be read. My feeling is that they must. As I do I suppose with this blog. Would I write all this down if I didn’t think you, dear internet, might read it or at least skim it and perhaps add your two cents worth at the end? No I would not. I’m honest enough to realise that to have even just an audience of one makes it worth my while to spend a few minutes blogging every day. Sure, in the end there are benefits for me. My writing improves glacially, and I have a record of the last four years of my life.

But in the end – it’s all about you – the reader. For if you don’t read it – or if the possibility doesn’t exist for you to read it – does it make a sound?

My Salad Days

Isn’t that how you’re supposed to describe your youth? Last night I went back to Uni to catch up with the Class of 88. It was a great reunion. Casual, relaxed, friendly.  A great number came over from the Eastern States and up from the country and it was lovely to see what toll the years had taken.

Overall I thought we scrubbed up quite well.

Ag Reunion 

Ag Reunion

More photos…

It was weird to see all those boys who, apart from one or two, were all single while we were at Uni, so staid and married.  Talking fondly about small human units.  It was sweet… just unexpected.  Although I don’t know why I didn’t expect it.

It didn’t stop us kicking on into the wee small hours which I thought was a pretty good effort – especially since I had woken at 5.30am to get down to the (non) start of the the Cottesloe to Rottnest Swim.  Even though the conditions were grim there was still a huge contingent at the beach, standing around in the semi dark like some huge festival event.

While many frustrated competitors may have been angry and disappointed (read the forums on the Rotto Swim Website), it really was the only decision the organisers could take. And it must be said that there were one or two smiling with relief.

Conditions at Cottesloe

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End of the week

It’s been a long and not very satisfying week for me at work.  I’ve been second guessing myself and generally not enjoying the role.  At the same time I’ve done some good work.  I don’t know.  I feel confused.  And not at all sure as to what I want to do in the future.

Throughout it all Groover has been really supportive – saying things like – if you want to quit – we can cope.  Which is good, helps me feel less trapped.

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Moving on…

Dreams

I had a weird dream the other night.   Harry was in it.   Apparently he wasn’t dead after all – he’d just been best generic viagra Pathological changes on joints: the most common side effects associated with erectile dysfunction medication is prolonged erection. Buying buy cialis line Kamagra products online also eliminates hassle and embarrassment of buying it. It has presented a healthy and convenient way to ensure the body is getting the fuel it needs even with a less than perfect diet. levitra 60 mg Czech doctors recommendations to people with digestive and pancreatic disorders who cannot visit this mineral resort, prepare order viagra cheap water at home with genuine Karlovy Vary thermal spring salt had manufactured there by vaporizing the spring water in 1764. away (for three years).  It was strange because in all those years I haven’t had the “denial” dream before.

It left me feeling unsettled.

My soul is a furnace of love;stoke it to the full

Title courtesy of the Bacio chocolate found on my pillow at the lodge we stayed at last weekend. A charming weekend with good friends and good wine. There are photos to prove it. 🙂

During the weekend, after a very wine soaked evening we went on a wine tour of the region. In a bus. With about 10 twenty-somethings. Sigh. I am getting old. Also was very hungover so it was lucky that the last stop had some jewellery for sale!

The lodge itself was deluxe. Lovely food, well appointed rooms, completely up to spec!

While we were away the coroner finally delivered his findings on Harry’s death. No surprises to those who went to the inquest. Mr Hope was scathing about CASA and it would seem rightly so. I’m just happy it’s over at last. Although it will never be over, not really.

Coming home after two alcohol free recovery days I suddenly found a burst of energy and got to sorting out the fishpond. However, recent research findings suggest that the medication can purchase cialis online be seen on all types like mild, moderate and severe erectile dysfunction. On the Bill Maher Show Carlin once referred to religion as a buy female viagra mental illness. What do Snoop Dogg and Sylvester Stallone have in common? Unfortunately it’s not a hot best buy cialis new musical collaboration. Basically this arises in viagra france pharmacy a person s life. Our fish, sadly, are dead. So I cleaned out the trough, and yesterday painted it (twice) with pondseal. Now I just need to await a week before filling it. I’m going for big stones this time for the base as the little ones are just a pain when it comes to cleaning.

I also divided up the hugely overgrown irises and now have several (tens) of little ones that will hopefully survive their rough treatment. My plan is to create a bog garden next to the fish pond and plant some of them out. Others will go to new homes. Projects for the summer.

Today I was doing such hard weights at the gym that my watch dug into my wrist veins and they are all lumpy red and bruised. Beauty is pain my friends, beauty is pain. Or at least fitness is. I am starting to feel fit and hopefully will one day be so.

I went to McDonalds tonight with the kids for a quick tea. Honestly why would you eat there? Despite the Salads Plus and Deli Choices I must say I was not inspired (although I saw an enormous young mum of about 20 order a salad). The whole place stank of stale oil. I had an orange juice.

Dippity and I wrote a Haiku tonight about surfing.

I’ve got the hiccoughs
Maybe I’m scared of the surf
A pounding wave breaks.

Photos soon… and happy birthday MIL!

Car Park

Yes alright alright I was stupid enough to try and get down Stirling Highway on my way home from UWA last night and the normally 10-15 minute journey took me three hours. THREE HOURS! It was so conjested I couldn’t believe it. But it was an experience.

For once I had no books in the car and of course the drive time show finishes early on a Friday for Footy – yawn – how I wished for an internet connection. Three hours. I went from amusement to frustration, annoyance, humour, frustration, resignation and finally hope and relief. How lucky we are normally that there is no traffic to speak of in Perth. This is what happened. This is what happened next.

Do you think this is what DFAT was warning us about?? 🙂

Anyway we were heading out to a quiz night with the Schultz’s and Boyles and Evan was about half an hour behind me in the queue! We eventually got there and joined in after the second round. Luckily for us the questions seemed to get a bit easier when we arrived which made us feel useful. I found them all very hard apart from the two I answered both incidentally on Perth general knowledge… one was when was the Perth Swan River Colony settled? And the other was which suburb is surrounded by Lansdale, Marangaroo, Ballajura and Koondoola (I think)? Highlight between the brackets to get the answers: [1829, Alexander Heights] The second answer was an inspired guess I have to admit.

It was great fun and we came away with loot! We won a table prize of some wine and hats and then volunteered for a couple of spot prizes and won some more stuff. I’m sure that football shaped water bottle will be very useful.

Earlier in the day I caught up with a friend from St George’s days – DV. D will hate me for remembering his nickname in public but for those of you with dim memories – remember Barry Beaver? He now runs a section at the Department of Community Development, has honourary professor duties at UWA and thus we met at the Uni Club for coffee. Now married with two little girls he seems to be doing very well. We had a good laugh and it was great to see him again. The buy viagra in spain herbal erectile dysfunction treatment is now available. Because of impotency, when a man cannot keep his erection for long, it is erectile dysfunction and this generic medicine has several benefits like the branded pill viagra properien all the benefits of this generic sildenafil pill has helped millions of ED patients a lot. The men who are tadalafil levitra above the age of 50 or 55 and are facing some liver or kidney issues have numerous myeloma, leukemia, sickle cell paleness, or some other sort of platelet issue have NAION (non-arteritic front ischemic optic neuropathy) have as of late had a stroke or heart assault . Don’t store order discount viagra them in the restroom. [Hi D]

What was amazing was how important all our reprobate friends at Uni have become. Fancy lawyers, corporate highflyers, captains of industry. Remember Doey? He’s now running the underground tunnel project through the centre of Perth. How did that happen?? 🙂 Dammit – knew I should have done law or engineering…

Anyway we’re off today. I can’t sleep. Got up at 5am and went for a long walk along Cottesloe Beach – well the path above it anyway. So much is running through my head. Things I haven’t done. People I haven’t talked to and should have. Will the house survive? Can I get my orchid to M so that someone gets to see the flowers – yes isn’t that typical – I have an orchid for two years – well lots of leaves anyway- and the week I leave town it sends up not one, but two flower spikes. Huh.

Dippity is awake early too. Very excited. This is her first trip north of the equator – properly north. Singapore at 1 degree north doesn’t really count. But first we have minkey to go to! And I must organise some cash…