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My son gave me a pair of minimalist footwear for Christmas.
We went down the supermarket to get one of those streaking kits with one of those caps that you pull through bits of hair but of course who wants to follow instructions!?
I’ve been to the hairdresser.
I’ve seen them do foils.
Piece of cake.
I can do that.
So we cut up strips of foil (a bit thin… thicker foil would be easier to work with), got out my comb with the sticky bit at the end.
And by sticky I mean stick-like not covered in goo.
And away we went.
As you’ll see in the video, Miss Dippity was a little worried.
“Can you book me into the proper hairdresser tomorrow Mum?”
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Just wait and see I said calmly.
(OMG I’m a bit worried I said inside)
But the result was…
Not bad for a beginner...
Okay.
And probably not blonde enough for my daughter.
Sigh.
Still I reckon I passed my apprenticeship:
Wife, mother, radio presenter, manager, actress, cardplayer, zumba dancer, cook, nurse, seamstress and now hairdresser.
Booyah!
(I don’t claim to do any of them particularly well)
I’m a sucker for hitting my macro switch and stopping to photograph – and even sometimes smell – the roses.
You know how it is, you’re walking to the train or the shops and you have your camera.
Well that’s me.
I loved these blossoms when I walked past them.
They grow right alongside Stirling Highway and they look beautiful.
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And then…
Get out the spray and wipe!
Dirty blossom.
Ah well I guess most people don’t view the world through their macro setting.
And maybe that’s a good thing.
Maybe sometimes it’s good just to walk by and not look too closely.
Our team, still not quite believing we're going to Tweed Heads. Photo: LLB
My long service leave is rapidly coming to a close and while I haven’t been on any extended overseas vacations, retrained, or sorted out my love life, I have played A LOT of bridge.
Four or five times a week will see me pulling cards with the best of them.
The last two weekends have been two full days of competition.
First the Swan River Pairs where we didn’t do that well… 56 out of 88 pairs… sigh.
And then in the last two days the GNOT finals.
This is the first time I’ve played in the GNOT – Grand National Open Teams – and up for grabs for the top three place getters a subsidized trip to the Gold Coast to play in the national play offs.
The GNOT’s start off at club level.
We placed second in the Nedlands Bridge Club heats and so with 19 other teams from around Perth competed in the weekend finals.
The teams final was 8 14-board matches and going into the last round we were sitting fourth, one point behind third.
We figured a win would get us to Queensland.
I was terrified that I would choke at the last hurdle but a wine at lunch-time had mellowed into a slight headache and I think the Panadol steadied my nerves.
The last board ended up as me to make 6NT.
Pressure!
I'm sitting East.
I get the queen of spades lead from South and I start counting tricks.
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Plan A – the diamonds – surely the fifth diamond will come good once I play four rounds.
The bad news is delivered at trick 2 when South shows out – I can’t even finesse for the 10.
Poop.
So thought is required.
I go into the tank for what feels like forever.
The hearts are my only hope.
I run the J which is covered by the Q and won with my K, now I play the 9 and let it run to North’s 10.
The 8 of hearts is my 12th trick.
Yay.
The result of the match – we scored a maximum.
As did about four other teams in the last round, including the people lying second playing the team sitting first.
Overall we ended up second which means (exciting club) that we get subsidised to travel to Tweed Heads to play in the national finals in November.
OMFG!
How cool is that?!
All that bridge practice finally paid off.
(I’ve been told if we win three matches we’ll have acquitted ourselves well. I’m just happy to go… now I just need to talk to my boss about a couple of days off… worried look!)
I can fit into my 13 year old daughter’s size 5 (US) jeans!
Sure I can’t breathe.
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But still.
C'mon confess! I know there are more than two of us...
I thought it was just me that kept a pair of tweezers in my car but the other day I discovered another close friend of mine had the same secret.
Yes we’re both (cough) forty-something (cough) and yes occasionally we’ve sat at the lights… looked in the visor mirror and almost spat out our take-away coffee.
Ugh!
What is THAT doing growing THERE?!!!
The problem is that at 40-something, not only do you start growing hair in unusual places but your eyesight is failing.
So it is rare for you to notice that stray hair until you are faced with the mega-magnification of that little mirror on the inside of your visor.
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Have you ever tried to pluck your eyebrows, needing glasses?
Trust me – it can’t be done.
Hence the tweezers in the car.
The ultra-magnification of the mirror allows you to see the wretched rogue hairs without glasses.
Yes, you look like an idiot at the lights…
But at least you don’t look like Wicked Witch of the East when you get to work.
Y’know when I applied for Long Service Leave I thought it would be a good idea.
Distracted by home life, I wasn’t able to concentrate and right now, work needs someone on the ball.
The leave was sitting there, the timing worked and I could concentrate what was left of my brain power on my kids.
But today, as I wandered about my house trying to find something to do, I realised that for the first time in a long time, I was bored.
I don’t think I’ve been bored for a very long time.
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The bluest of skies, the sun glinting through the trees.
I spent the day gardening.
Weeding can be therapeutic, don’t you think?
Firstly the physical act of pulling out a plant is satisfying.
It’s like you are removing all the imperfections of your own life.
Take that unpaid bills!
Poor game of bridge!
Annoying kids!
Nagging husband!
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Then it is so good to look at the garden bed, smooth and perfect at the end.
Of course, as the garden bed becomes more and more perfect, you become less so.
Dirt marks your face and streaks your clothes, your nails fill with mud and crack, your knees start to ache and your back protests.
It makes me think that whenever I see perfection, I’m really looking at hard work.
That somewhere, like The Picture of Dorian Gray, there is a dirty, unkempt, maybe injured person – the agent of the perfection before you.
Nothing’s perfect.
And perhaps the most perfect looking things are the least perfect of all.
Even now, when I look at my newly weeded garden beds I can see the stubborn shoots of the odd weed poking their way out to taunt me.
I took this photograph of the Fremantle Prison wall back in April.
I love it.
I love the way it looks like a map you’d find in the front of a fantasy novel with places like Midkemia and Great Kesh written in a cursive font as if by a ancient map maker.
Even the edges seem shaded to denote a high rainfall area or maybe a high population.
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Or maybe it could be the surface of an ancient gourd, uncovered from a buried civilisation.
Or maybe not.
Yes.
It’s just a wall.
But sometimes isn’t it nice to dream that things are more than they are.
Interviewer: So perhaps you could tell us your greatest weakness…
Applicant: Well I guess my greatest weakness is that I can get caught up in a job and feel compelled to finish it up – to the point where I will lose track of time.
I started making a dress for my baby girl last night and found I just couldn’t stop!
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