Right that’s it! Cellobella had had enough. Fed up with an enormous Hoover, heavy, impractical and bloody useless she held her hand over the base of the vacuum. As she suspected it didn’t suck.

This beast of an appliance had been the bane of her life since Groover had proudly extracted it, shining, dark red and enormous from its box several years ago. I’m afraid she wasn’t very grateful for the expensive purchase.

What is that?

It’s a vacuum cleaner.

Why did you buy an upright vacuum cleaner? Did you not ask me what I wanted? Did I not clearly articulate that I wanted a light, quiet, pull along model?

Yes you did.

Did you not also consult with our cleaner (sadly no longer with the household because she couldn’t stand the bloody vacuum cleaner)?

Yes.

Did she not say she would prefer to use a light pull along cleaner which is better for her back.

Um.

?????

Choice said it was the best.

Well I’m not bloody using it.

Two years ago…

So maybe we could sell that wretched thing… where is that write up from Choice?

Um… I can’t find it?

Right. Well seeing as we are poor now and can’t afford a cleaner (particularly one who will bring her own vacuum) you will have to do the vacuuming!

Today… Groover leaves for Karratha. Cellobella decides to use the Hoover to clean the house. There is only so long one can go, crunching over the floor. It doesn’t suck.

Cellobella now owns a brand new Meile 5210. It is blue. It is small. It is light. It is quiet. It has a telescopic wand. It can lie down flat to get under chests of drawers. It sucks.

Next weekend, Groover can do the tidying and cleaning of surfaces, kitchen and bathrooms and Cellobella will be happy to take Milly out for a spin! 🙂

[Big Red now has been banished out the back]

And for the record, this is what Choice says about it: (it scored 2nd best of the range tested)

MIELE S5210

Good points

• Good dirt removal on carpet.
• Excellent for dirt removal from a hard floor.
• Good range of tools, with onboard storage.
• Variable power.
• Telescopic wand.
• Very good reach from the power point.
• Fairly lightweight.
• Dustbag is easy to install and remove.

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Bad points

• Nothing in particular.