I’ve got an itchy foot. An actual itchy foot, not wanderlust. Or maybe it is wanderlust too? It’s just at the top of my left foot near where the leg starts but on the flat of the top of the foot… if that makes sense.

Have you ever noticed that if you start thinking about an itchy foot or somewhere else and you don’t scratch it immediately that all of a sudden other bits start getting itchy… like your right shoulder, the back of your left thigh where it’s against the chair, your head… And then you scratch your foot but it’s too late …your shoulder, thigh, damn now my chin niggles at you.

What’s going on?! It was just my foot one minute ago!

Does that ever happen to you?

It’s like when you hear someone talking about nits – that’s it! I’m scratching my head. Even if there is no, absolutely no chance of me having them, I’ve been living on my own in the desert for a month, no contact with children and my head is shaved anyway… suddenly it’s itchy.

Sorry. Are you scratching your head now?

That was just mean wasn’t it? But isn’t it true!!
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It’s like our bodies are pre-programmed for suggestion… maybe it comes from when we were apes… I mean we’re still apes but when we were in the jungle picking lice off eachother… maybe it’s hard-wired into our DNA to scratch so that others will come over and groom us, pick the odd crawly out of our hair…

After all that saying “I’ll scratch your back, if you scratch mine” had to be based on something…

GROOVER! What are you doing? My back! Oooooooh darling that’s it… a bit to the left… ahhhhh.

What? You’ve got an itch where?

Isn’t it time for me to be putting on the dinner…

photo credit: belgianchocolate