Tag Archives: children

Big Mother

Despite previous accusations I’m not a helicopter parent.

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Yes I take an active interest in what my two adult children are doing.

Yes I regularly ask my daughter where she is, but she does live with us and usually I’m either asking if she is joining us for dinner or if she’s seen a piece of clothing I can’t find…

But I don’t ask to track them.

Maybe it wasn’t a thing when they were in their early 20s but I was shocked when a young 21 year old told me recently that his mother insists he shares his location.

And then a fellow mother said she too insists her 19 year old share location. For peace of mind.

On my soapbox I got and declared that they were adults and shouldn’t have to share their location with anyone!

Flash forward to a couple of weeks ago. Hugo (27) left to travel from Perth to Cairns in his little hybrid Honda. He offered to share his location with his parents (and grandparents).

Did I say yes? Of course I did.

Did I stalk him as he traveled across the country? Of course I did.

Following the journey

Did it bring me peace of mind? Kind of. I must say there was a moment when I could see the car had been driven off the main highway and I conjured up a scenario where he was bogged, or maybe the car had been stolen and dumped. But I didn’t voice those concerns to anyone and was quietly relieved when the next time I checked he’d moved on. A mother thing?

Hugo arrived safely in Cairns and is due to start his Masters in
Tropical Biology and Conservation in the next week or so.

But I wonder, where do you draw the line at sharing YOUR location?

Geocaching sucks

Where is the treasure??

We went to the cousins for Easter – and a lovely lunch was had – and after lunch, the kids all hyped up on sugar, we wandered down to the local park for a spot of geocaching.  As you do.

What’s geocaching, asks young 8 year old nephew of his Uncle Groover.

It’s like treasure hunting says Groover, staring at his smartphone.

And it’s 30 metres away… 20 metres away…

The kids were getting excited.

It’s ten metres away… 8…

It must be in that tree says Dippity.

It takes maybe one minute to find the film canister at the bottom of a burnt out hole in the tree.

Oohh what’s inside it.

There’s a little pad to log your find and a note explaining geocaching, and a little pencil.

Dippity signs the log book and the film canister is put back in the tree.

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Wait.

Is that it?

Where’s the treasure?

I thought there was going to be a clue that led to another clue and then we’d get a whole bunch of Easter eggs, says Mr 8 who has probably had enough Easter eggs.

That sucks.

And I must admit, his expectations had rather been raised.

Later, after goodbyes were said, and mothers dropped home, Groover, Dippity and I went geocaching again.

Now THIS is treasure.

Treasure!!!

A tip for next time.

Let the 8-year-olds in your party hold the phone.

Merry-not-go-round

Geraldton 2008

I love this photo – my two gorgeous ones laughing and enjoying being kids on a swingy roundabout.

But they won’t be able to do that again.

The fun police – the wrap your children in cotton wool brigade – have decided that it’s too dangerous.

I’m in Geraldton and I discover to my SHOCK that the Merry Go Round by the Sea otherwise known as the 50 cent swing has been clamped to the ground!

Where is the fun in that I ask you???
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It’s a seat.

Merry Go Round

Meh. 

Merry go round

Not happy. (despite the photo)

No going back

How did I look after my two kids when they were little?

Yesterday, we picked up the younger cousins (4 & 3) for a sleepover.  My sister-in-law needed some free time to pack as they are moving house soon.

The big cousins are fantastic with them.  Hide and seek, mudworld, swimming, they are like built-in au pairs who look after the two littlies with good grace and humour.

Within an hour of getting home yesterday, in the middle of the first game of hide and seek though, the 3 year old started crying, holding her neck.

There was no blood but she was in a lot of pain and couldn’t be comforted.

We all packed into the car and went to see the doctor who prescribed Painstop and thought she must have strained her neck, like whiplash.

It did put a damper on things but Dippity remembered the chocolate icecream we’d bought and the Princesses DVD and 3 decided that she wanted to stay on the sleepover!

Dippity was brilliant at cuddling her and distracting her from the pain.  Brilliant.

Of course I rang her mum to let her know of the drama but that 3 seemed okay if sore.

The rule with children is “never wake a sleeping child”, we all know that, but because of the suspected head injury the doctor advised that we should. 
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So we did, and she cried, so we gave her some more medicine and took her for a wee and she went back to sleep.

In the morning she was fine.  Her neck still stiff and putting a tee-shirt on and off painful, but smiling and wanting to go for a swim.

(We rang mum to tell her she was better, and mum reported a lovely sleep-in)

Today we’ve had mudworld, a swim, a tv show and now they are walking to the DVD library for a movie (we’re hoping it will tire them out a bit).

I’ve got 20 minutes to write this and reflect, maybe finish a cup of tea.

You know, I don’t think I could look after little ones again full-time.  They are exhausting!  Little balls of never-ending energy.  

I’d forgotton how you become the entertainment machine – always thinking ahead to the next activity, the next snack, the next meal.

It makes me appreciate my teenagers.  Sure, sometimes you only get the odd grunt out of them but they are self sufficient.

And I especially appreciate how good they are with their small cousins.

Another reason I’m a bad mother

My desk at work

My daughter’s friend’s mother said that my daughter described me as a workaholic.
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That’s bad isn’t it?

Another reason I’m a bad mother

My desk at work

My daughter’s friend’s mother said that my daughter described me as a workaholic.
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That’s bad isn’t it?

Not a perfect mother

Generally I think I’m a pretty good mother. My kids are pretty polite. They have good senses of humour. They do their jobs around the house, mostly without complaint or too much nagging. They are lovely with younger kids. They know they are loved.

But held up to the light of my sister-in-law’s mothering I’m afraid my mothering looks a little slapdash to say the least. Now I will say that she is a former nanny so well qualified to be a mother… having your own kids is different though wouldn’t you say?

Last night we had her two kids, aged 4 and 2 and a half, to stay the night. Our first sleepover. The youngest, a little girl, has really come on with her language and was able to tell me she was hungry and what she was hungry for. After dinner (which she had at home) she ate two tomatoes, a yoghurt and two plums. She’s such a good eater. They both got ready for bed when asked with no fuss and brushed their teeth, asking me for help to get to the back teeth.

In the cubby house
The 2-year old cousin enters the lounge room cubby house

At about 7.30 – half an hour after their regular bed time – and while watching Cars (a surprisingly good film), they asked to go to bed. They are both dry, the little one calling out to me to take her to the loo at about 11pm.

We then ate our Thai takeaway with the big kids.

In the morning they played with our two for a while before asking me if I could help get them dressed… and therefore get out of bed. For breakfast the little one had two bowls of Just Right, a plum, a pear and about a third of a bowl of porridge. Her brother had one big bowl of porridge. I’m documenting this because I’m frankly astounded by how much she eats and the fact they do so without whinging or fussing.

Then they made a cubby before heading outside to get wet and dirty in “Mudworld”.

The boys make the dam

The boys make the dam in Mudworld

Quick quick help me fix the walls

The dam walls start to break – but the little ones just look on delightedly as Hugamuga desperately tries to shore up the walls.

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The dam finally breaks

The dam breaks – success?!

Baths and lunch – what child eats Branston Pickle sandwiches?! And then Mum came and picked them up.

Drink up!

I'm just going to take a break...

They are Stepford Children – perfectly behaved. Cute. And they eat!

So what lesson could be learned?

Maybe all new mothers should spend a year nannying before giving birth?

Hmmm how low do we want the population rate to fall?

Ahh forget it. My two are gorgeous. I love them anyway just the way they are. Anyone for porridge?

No? Just me again.

Eat my skort!

A classic line from my Simpsons inspired daughter tonight. I don’t know whether to feel worried that she watches too much telly or proud that she came out with such a fully sick line.

Of course there have been other memorable moments over the years… here’s just a few:

Daddy’s got a trumpet – (after listening to Groover humming in the front seat)
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He was killed in the First World War- (long pause) – It wasn’t me!
Who wrote ‘Hugamuga’ on your bedroom wall Hugamuga? – It was Dippity (she was one)
R U B B I S H – said in scary Exorcist voice – a little girl aged 2.

Lazy blogger

That’s me.

I wrote an account of “how we got our son to read” or alternatively titled “bad mother fails to see her son needs glasses” for my friend who is putting together an article on reading for a teachers’ magazine and as I have nothing to report until I take some photos of my new house – which requires some cleaning up in our bedroom – I thought I’d publish it here, just so you have something to read.

So here we go:

My son is a bright kid. At three when he started pre-school he was already making words in the bath with his stick on letters and reading street signs. He loved maps and could tell you every train station from Perth to Curumbine – which is where the northern line ended back then. He also knew all the stations to Fremantle, Midland and Armadale. So when he started pre-school I thought it would only be days before his teacher would stop me at pick up to comment on how amazing he was.

She never did. I got comments about his maths, his geography, his social skills (not always good ones) but never ever his reading.

And he would never read fiction books! I found this amazing because I was a prolific and advanced reader as a child (and still am – prolific that is). I naturally thought my son would be the same. I read to him every night. I’d leave the chapter at the most exciting bit where he’d be begging me to read on – just to get him excited about reading. But nothing worked. He would only read non-fiction books. Oh and map books.

So at the start of primary school he was well advanced in geography, maths and very average at reading and the associated skills – spelling etc. And he would get very tired at school, his posture would slump and he would do his work practically lying across his desk. He still wouldn’t read a page of writing. You would think at this point alarm bells might have gone off in my head. But no.

Then we discovered Captain Underpants. Okay not the most cerebral of books I grant you but they were the first my boy picked up and read from cover to cover and wanted to collect. I felt the drought had broken. Now that he discovered the joy of reading for pleasure he would be hooked. But he couldn’t read the good Captain forever – what next?

Well next was a breakthrough. Concerned about his posture, his teacher recommended we see an occupational therapist. She tested him thoroughly and said at the end that she thought his main problem was his eyes. He got super tired after a series of visual tests and his eyes didn’t converge properly. valsonindia.com cialis online They will feel scared, confused, frustrated, rejected and unloved. Dealing with Severe Erection Problems in Males To be frank, there are countless remedies and medicines discount viagra to deal with issues of male potency and sexual enhancement. Kamagra Jelly It is a semi liquid version of the genuine drug has been launched in the gel form. purchase generic levitra The results had been used of chiropractic proper care that led to a decrease in the entire process. on line cialis http://valsonindia.com/100-cotton-yarns-of-all-counts/?lang=af She recommended a developmental optometrist and we booked in for an appointment. My son was eight years old.

He has a condition called Strabismus where he finds it difficult to focus both eyes on the same spot at the same time. This means that it’s very hard to keep the words aligned on the page. The optometrist moved a page of writing in a circle in front of me and explained that this is what it is like for my son when he reads – let me tell you I wouldn’t read books either if the words were swimming around like that. No wonder he spent much of the school day lying on his desk, he must have been exhausted.

So we got glasses. Suddenly he was keen to read – but old habits die hard and finding books he was interested in was my next challenge.

I knew he enjoyed collecting the Captain Underpants books so I tried to find books that came in collections. Then I looked for books which appealed to his interests. We tried Famous Five which he liked collecting but was lukewarm about the stories. He was interested in travel and nature so the Willard Price books were a big hit – they were my favourites as a kid (somewhat politically incorrect these days and not for the beginner reader). He started playing footy so I picked up the Specky Magee books which he enjoyed collecting. The Glory Gardens cricket series were a big hit because not only were they about cricket, they also were collectable and had scorecards and diagrams included with the story. A winner. Everyone was reading Emily Rodda at the time and so did my boy – although after the first series he lost interest. He never really enjoyed Harry Potter (the only kid in the world!) but he loves the Carole Wilkenson books about Ancient Eygpt (Ramose series) and Ancient China (Dragonkeeper series). And last year he absolutely devoured Hover Car Racer by Matthew Reilly. Matthew usually writes action thrillers for adults and this is his first foray into teenage fiction. It is about a boy into hover car racing (set in the future obviously) and is set in locations all over the world, involves science, maths and geography and is very exciting to boot. Matthew also writes in short sentences. Very easy to read. A winner!

Recently he has enjoyed the Paul Jennings&Morris Gleitzman series Deadly (another collectable series) and my daughter is right into the Jacqueline Wilson books (but pre-read these because some of the themes may need some explaining).

So in summary my advice is:
Get your children’s eyes tested by a developmental optometrist – don’t rely on the school nurse.
Choose collectable books. They like collecting stuff and it’s easier on you!
Choose books which feed off their other interests.
Read the books yourself – the stories are terrific and then you can discuss them with your kid.
Ask your friends what their children enjoy for ideas.

Speaking of which… any recommendations?